5 Ways to Keep Your Relationship Strong During the Holidays
Ahh, the holidays. The lights are sparkling, the air smells like cinnamon and pine, and everywhere you look, people seem to be caught up in the magic of the season. But let’s be real—this time of year can also bring its fair share of stress, especially for couples. Between navigating family expectations, financial pressures, and the sheer busyness of it all, it’s easy to feel like you and your partner are running on autopilot.
But, it doesn’t have to be that way. With a little intention and a whole lot of teamwork, you can not only survive the holidays but actually come out stronger and more connected as a couple. Here are five ways to keep your relationship thriving through the holiday season.
1. Schedule Dedicated Couple Time
The holiday calendar fills up fast—parties, family dinners, shopping trips—it’s easy for quality time with your partner to fall by the wayside. That’s why it’s so important to make space for each other amidst the chaos.
What this looks like:
Plan a holiday ritual just for the two of you. Maybe it’s a movie marathon with all the cheesy holiday rom-coms or a cozy night sipping hot cocoa while you write down your goals for the new year.
Block off time in your shared calendar specifically for couple moments. Once it’s scheduled, treat it like any other commitment—non-negotiable!
Holiday Date Ideas:
Visit a holiday market or festival.
Cook a meal together while blasting your favorite holiday playlist.
Take a scenic evening walk to look at the lights in your neighborhood.
2. Create a Joint Holiday Budget
Money stress can turn even the most joyous holiday into a major buzzkill. Gifts, travel, and events add up fast, and financial strain can put tension on your relationship. That’s why it’s crucial to get on the same page about holiday spending.
What this looks like:
Sit down together to create a list of all your expected expenses—everything from gifts to travel to decorations. Then, set a realistic spending limit for each category.
Track your spending together using a budgeting app like Mint or a simple spreadsheet. This keeps you both accountable and reduces surprises.
Ask Yourself: What’s one area where we could cut back to focus on what really matters this holiday season?
3. Strategize Family Expectations Together
Let’s talk about family. Oftentimes, the holidays mean reconnecting with extended family—which can be a beautiful thing, but also may come with its own set of challenges. From juggling different traditions to managing conflicting expectations, it’s easy to feel pulled in a million directions.
What this looks like:
Communicate openly about what works for you as a couple. Maybe you can’t attend every single gathering, and that’s okay. Decide together which events to prioritize and where to set boundaries.
Have a game plan for setting boundaries. For example, you might say, “We’d love to stop by for a few hours, but we’ll need to leave early for our own plans.” Having each other’s back makes all the difference.
4. Communicate with Care and Intention
The holidays can bring out all kinds of emotions—excitement, stress, nostalgia. With so much going on, it’s easy for small miscommunications to spiral into big arguments. That’s why checking in with each other regularly is key.
What this looks like:
Make it a habit to ask, “How are you feeling about everything this week?” Sometimes, simply being heard can relieve a lot of stress.
Use “I” statements to express your needs without sounding accusatory. For example, instead of saying, “You’re spending too much money,” try, “I feel worried about our budget. Can we revisit it together?”
5. Protect Your Energy with Boundaries
This time of year can be emotionally and physically draining. If you’re not careful, all the busyness can leave you feeling too worn out to show up for your partner. That’s why setting boundaries—not just with others, but also with yourselves—is so important.
What this looks like:
Pay attention to your energy levels. If you’re feeling depleted, let your partner know and work together to make a plan to recharge.
Be intentional about which invitations and traditions you say yes to. Just because something is a tradition doesn’t mean it has to be part of your life every year.
Give yourselves permission to say no. Sometimes, the best way to protect your relationship is to prioritize rest and connection over everything else.
Wrapping It All Up
The holidays can be a whirlwind, but they’re also a beautiful opportunity to deepen your connection as a couple. By carving out time for each other, tackling stressors as a team, and protecting your energy, you can create a holiday season filled with joy, love, and connection.
Ready to take your holiday connection to the next level? Grab your copy of our Sleighing the Holidays Together workbook—a 30-page digital guide packed with strategies to help you navigate holiday stress, family dynamics, and busy schedules while staying deeply connected to each other. You can also schedule a couples session with one of our relationship experts to build a personalized game plan for your relationship this season.
Here’s to a season that’s as joyful and loving as the two of you deserve. ❤️
Happy Holidays!
